Zeal-less

Well we're home again obviously. I haven't had the blogging zeal lately. I've barely had the diaper-washing zeal, and if only one thing gets done it's going to be diapers. Some day perhaps we'll bore those of you who haven't already heard it with the interminalble story of "Christmas in the Airport 2005!" It's pretty intense and I can't seem to muster all the necessary negative adjectives at the moment. I'll come back to it when I find the thesarus. We got shelves for Christmas (woo-hoo!) and our books are finally in some semblance of order. We have an actual reference section now. Seriously.

Some friends stopped by the other day for lunch and suggested that we get a library card. Little do they know. I have cards for -several- L.A. area cities because I have a sad history with the "return" part of the whole "check out" equation. I went to the Highland Park library to check out some books yesterday and I couldn't because I had too many late fees. I'd had books out so long they were declared "lost". I had to go the Pasadena library instead. If the Library Science school ever finds out about this I'll be black-balled for sure. I can always say in my application that I love google, the L. of C. categorization system and "the cage," that I hate Dr. Laura, backgournd checks and the FBI and I'm all for homeless people looking at porn in the library whenever they want. That, and an ACLU membership should get me in for sure. You've got to love those fierce librarians. Whenever I hear about librarians vicsiously defending peoples' reading lists I picture that old librarian in Venice (?) in Indiana Jones who looks like she could eviscerate Harrison Ford if he tempts her.

It's funny to me that I could actually end up pursuing a career as something I pretended to be as a child. I went through a phase where I would stamp or shush anything that came near me. I also went through a priest phase, where I carried an open book in front of me and recited a jumbled Episcopal liturgy. All the other phases were pretty run of the mill: ballerina, cook, trampoline gymnast, Maria Von Trapp, doctor, and of course the ever popular Magical Pony Doctor.

So Christmas: It was good to see our family. It would be good if the guy with the shopping cart would stop walking back and forth in front of the house during nap time. And how many garbage trucks do we really need on one block at the same time?

Anyway, we got (and gave, if I do say so myself) some truly wonderful gifts. Wren received a Thomas the Tank Engine from her Nana which she can ride around. Her eyes glaze with excitement and wonder when she looks at it. She could sit on it and push the buttons for hours, but unfortunately her balance usually gives out about 20 minutes in and she tumbles off the side. The only thing that can compete with the train is, of course, poor Ramona, who spends her time either doing her best to avoid Wren or stoically accepting her "petting." I'm filled with such gratitude for our wonderful put-upon puppy.

And I'm also filled with homesickness for places and people. I love our friends in CA, and in my head I know the people here are a better match for us now- with common interests and dreams and yadda yadda, but I'm lazy and I miss the no-work friendships with less-matchy friends and family back home. In addition to being private and lazy I'm also self-conscious and worried about imposing. New friendships are tender territory; there's only a few months of history. I just have to remind myself that every friendship has been new. Even Kelly and I, in the summer between 4th and 5th grade were awkward with each other. If I told her which counselor I liked, would she tell the rest of the cabin? If I had to pee in the middle of the night could I wake her up to help me look for snakes on the way to the bathroom? Now it's more like, "Will you tell all our friends how filthy my house was when you stopped by?" "Is it okay to call you for no reason except to see if you want to come to Target with me to return some panties that are too small for my post-pregnancy ass?"

Oh, who am I kidding? It was fat before Wren. Damn those cheetos and their perfect orange faux-cheesiness.

That's all the news I'm up for sharing today. I hope all of you are enjoying the new year.