The Jetta is packed, the doors are locked and the diapers are drying on the line. Lazlo and I are just waiting around trying to think of ways to stay awake until it's time to leave for the airport. We're leaving tonight, God willing, on a 12:30 flight to Atlanta, where we'll catch another flight to Austin that will get in at 9:30 am. So techically we're leaving tomorrow. The 23rd is a blackout day for buddy passes, so we have to fly on the very cusp of Christmas Eve. Not how I'd imagined spending the holidays, but oh well. Hopefully we'll make it on the flight and not have to sit around until the next one leaves at 6 am. And of course worse case is we get stuck in Atlanta. Merry Christmas. At least Wren will be asleep for the first flight.
Poor poor Ramona is using her super-sense to detect that we're leaving. She knows as soon as someone gets the first suitcase out of the closet. She's just a jittery mess for days. Every time I walk to the mailbox she stands at the door whimpering, as though she thinks, "This is it, she's just going to keep walking." We've lined up various friends to feed and walk her while we're gone (THANK YOU ALL!) but we're still missing a day. Ramona is going to be one hungry pee-filled dog on the 27th. If anyone would like to volunteer just give us a call.
Well it's time to wake up the baby and hit the road. I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas.
Aren't they cuties? Wren's favorite new game is "hit the laptop," so we spend a fair amount of time moving it out of her reach. You can't tell, but in this picture she's actually making her sing-songy yelling noise and taking a brief break from chasing the computer all over the bed. These days her reach is pretty impressive. In the course of one day I've pulled a penny, a straight pin, a bottle cap, and my ring out of her mouth. She usually gives me a little warning, a gasp, a gurgle and frequently a little gagging, to let me know she's got something stuck in her mouth. I jump up and run over and root around in there and pull whatever it is out and then spend 5 minutes shaking and thanking God that I don't have to explain to my mom how I let her only grandchild choke on a penny.
Of course I've also pulled countless other non-swallowable things out of her mouth, like cell phones, diet coke, Ramona's face, and the ever popular laptop. A drop in blogging activity could be attributed to the fact that when Wren is awake we can't use the computer without her "help" unless someone else is distracting her by doing something facinating elsewhere. No fail distractions include: flushing the toilet, opening/closing the refrigerator door, anything to do with Ramona, trash, or keys. Wren's new mobility still has us reeling. I'm struggling to keep up and get the house into a safe shape. Right now I feel a little bit like Mad Eye Moody in Goblet of Fire; Constant Vigilance.
I have a brief moment now before I have to feed the baby, and I'd like to spend it with my husband, so forgive the abrupt ending.
Happy Birthday Lazlo. Congratulations on reaching your mid-to-late twenties such a stunningly handsome and brilliantly accomplished young man. No, but really, I'm delighted to be your wife. Feliz Cumpleaños!
Baby and I both, unbeknownst to one another, wrote blogs about the same period of time. Baby's entry (as you can see below) is a masterpiece. Each numbered point is another precise brushstroke on the canvas of blog greatness. My entry sounds like a NOAA weather radio announcement. Here is an excerpt:
1800: WEDDING BEGINS ... LAZLO AND RHOMBUS READ SCRIPTURE ... RHOMBUS TERRIFIES CROWD WITH JONATHAN EDWARDS IMPERSONATION ...
1830: MELIO AND MOSESFACE MARRY... THE GHOST OF MR. ROGERS READS LITURGY ...
2030:RECEPTION COMMENCES ... GIANT ICE SWAN ATTACKS THREE GUESTS ...
You get the idea.
Also noteworthy: Williams-Sonoma has once again upped the marshmallow ante (remember the Make-Your-Own-Peeps kit?), with the introduction of the $18 SACK OF MARSHMALLOWS:
Remarkable for their impressive size and airy texture, our old-fashioned treats are crafted using a meticulous three-day process. Regular marshmallows boast a subtle vanilla flavor; chocolate ones are enhanced with Guittard cocoa. This special set includes 12 marshmallows of each flavor. (Approx. 1 lb. 10 oz. total.) A Williams-Sonoma exclusive.
It's the meticulous three-day process that makes them so expensive, see. But wait -- they're LESS expensive than THESE bad boys, tipping the price scales at 89 CLAMS (or bones, or whatever you call them) WHICH ONLY TAKE TWO DAYS TO MAKE!
As soft and billowy as clouds, this pair of exquisite marshmallows is a sweet remembrance of your special day. The marshmallows are handcrafted the old-fashioned way, using the finest natural ingredients and a meticulous candymaking process that requires two days from start to finish. The fluffy marshmallows are delicious right out of the box – or your guests can enjoy them as a luxurious topping for hot chocolate or coffee. Each box includes two scrumptious flavors: decadent chocolate and delicate raspberry. For elegant presentation, finish the clear boxes with our monogrammed or personalized ribbon (we suggest the 3/8” ribbon, sold separately). These premium confections are made by Rubicon Bakery, a nonprofit company in Richmond, CA. ...
So, not only do these two-day marshmallows cost $1.85 EACH, but they're actually made by a non-profit organization that works exclusively for Williams-Sonoma? How exactly does that work? I smell a tax shelter. An airy, delicious tax shelter.
ANYWAY. Please read Baby's latest entry (below) because it's really fantastic. And you should also read the Comics Curmudgeon if you hate Marmaduke and Curtis as much as Baby does.
I love Christmas and the whole advent season. It was really nice to be home in Texas for the start of the holidays, although that's not to say I'm not overjoyed to be back in Cali. It was funny being stuck in the Salt Lake City airport for hours wandering from gate to gate in search of flights to LA. It was like every weird or unusual person in SLC was vying for a seat on a plane to our great city. It felt nice to be among them.
Rather than post 14 times with detailed updates about all that has transpired since last I blogged, I'll just make a list of interesting/embarassing incidents or occurences, and you can ask for exigesis on your favorites when you next talk to me.
1. Wren wakes up at 4 am these days, and tries to go to sleep around 6 at night. This makes things interesting.
2. I decorated the weird tentacley pine tree in our front yard with lights and ornaments but it looks like I stood 10 ft away on a ladder and threw clumps at random.
3. When reaching into the airplane aisle after a dropped toy, I was hit on the head with the large metal drink cart. I'm pretty sure every person on the plane knew about it within moments, and the flight attendants continuously asked if they could bring me ice. The man next to me told me to find a lawyer, and my seat mate on the other side wrangled a free vodka because, "you hit my friend with that cart..."
4. I secured a lovely art deco chest of drawers for Wren, and some fun Frankhoma ware for me, from my grandmother's estate.
5. Wren is totally mobile now, and can actually pull up to standing whenever she wants. Our house is woefully unprepared.
6. Ramona threw up in the car at the end of her 23 hour ride to Austin, allegedly due to Col. Rhombus's bad driving.
7. On their honeymoon, Melio and Mosesface attempted to "do it" in a cave, but were foiled by a group of obese tourists who lagged behind the group.
8. My grandmother Alley's ancient neighbor, Mrs. Lee, who speaks mostly German, insisted on bringing her chainsaw to Alley's house to singlehandedly cut and drag the giant pine tree out of her swimming pool. I looked out the window to see Alley delicately balanced on one end of the monstrous trunk over the pool, serving as a counterbalance as Mrs. Lee furiuosly attacked the branches.
9. I can definitely not hold my liquor if it's in tequila form. I'm a lush. Apologies all around (and especially to poor poor Chet).
10. I purchased a pack-n-play for $15 (SCORE!) from the coolest store in my hometown- the Treasure House. I also got to hang with the store's manager and the matriarch of my favorite family, the Rushes. I wish I could have spent more time at their kitchen table playing rummicub and eating cookies.
11. Wren and I hitched a ride from Beaumont to Austin with Stands with a Fist and her on/off boyfriend Jerusha. We took one of my family's fleet of Oldsmobile Cutlass Cieras. The ride was made more interesting by the malfunction of a children's puzzle that my mom gave the baby. At random intervals it emitted sceechy animal sounds (frog, cat, fish, and what appears in the picture to be guinea pig..?) and almost startled us off the road a few times.
12. In what will go down as one of my most shameful memories, I said a certain 9 letter word starting with 'C' in front of Melio's grandmother on the morning of his wedding, at a Bridal Brunch held in honor of Mosesface. I didn't know Grandma was there, but that's no excuse. Oh, the shame.
13. It's sad that for three days Lazlo and I had total unlimited babysitting and instead of making out in the back of a movie theatre or going to a fancy schmancy restaurant, we worked like dogs planning, setting up for, and participating in a wedding.
14. Mosesface was absolutely radiant and stunning. Melio was dashingly handsome in his vest. They seemed glittery and larger than life. As M-Rhod said at the time, singing with them at the wedding was like "being in heaven". We had a great time. Mazel-tov.
In "back at home" news, we'll be having a little get together soon to celebrate the end of the quarter and Lazlo's last year in the mid-20s. I'm sure you're all invited, but you'll have to leave if you make fun of my Christmas tree.
