30 weeks down, 10 weeks to go
Well it turns out I should have been using all these months of pre-third trimester life to plan the third trimester. The childbirth class I want to take lasts 12 weeks, which puts my graduation date at around the time I hope to be handing the three week old to Millie and heading down to Cozumel for Spring Break '05. I can't even get into a class because I was supposed to register way back in the first trimester (which is actually more of a quatro-mester, so there's really no excuse) Back then I had nothing but free time... and vomit of course, I also had a lot of vomit.
This brings a whole new reality to the concept of husband-coached childbirth. I hope Lazlo is ready. For those of you who might be inclined to think a life in the steam tunnels of Caltech hardens a man, Lazlo almost passed out when I got a heplock in my arm a few months ago. I showed him a picture of an umbilical stump in a baby magazine, and he threw up in his mouth. The word -placenta- makes him uncomfortable, and I'm afraid colustrum might be the whole "baby" deal-breaker.
We'll have to see if there's some kind of labor/delivery crash course available. 1-2-3-squat. Maybe I'll ask the doctor the next time I see him...
That's a joke, folks. I may or may not ever see him again, depending on who's on call when we go to the hospital. I did get to meet him, after waiting for two hours and being hassled about the damn TB test again. He seems nice and practical and for some reason he gave us an ultrasound picture of the baby's femur. umm...thanks. He made a run for the door, but Lazlo held him down while I asked all the questions I had written down on the back of an envelope.
The guy on the computer next to me keeps making "I'm so astonished" noises, presumably so I'll ask him what he's looking at. I'm trying to ignore him but it's growing more impossible by the second. This, added to the annoyingness of his whole deamenor, is going to necessitate an abrupt ending to my post. Someone buy me an iBook and broadband at my house. Thank you in advance.
I know that guy (next to you on the computer). He is pretty obnoxious. I hate the way he rides around on his little skateboard like his shit don't stink.
Maybe you should just have a c-section. Don't let Chase see what's on the other side of the curtain though. He might vomit and then pass out. I don't remember much of my lamaze class other than "heee-heee-whoooooo". You will be ok. Women have babies squatting in the Ozarks allll the time.
Go for the epidural! Breathing didn't help me at all and I had 4 (1st visualizing birth in the forest w/breathing techniques-OWWWW!). Best wishes to you!